Learn to treat the body as a dress. The dress is not you. Know that your body is extremely fragile, however, strong it may be. Even a mosquito can kill you. You have the body; the body does not have you. ‘I have a car’ is different from ‘the car has me’. Likewise, to say you have money is one thing and to say the money has you is decidedly different. One has to respect the body and take care of it. See the beauty of the body. The flower is fragile but still beautiful. In the same way, our body is fragile and impermanent, but still it is beautiful. The notion that only the permanent is beautiful is a myth.
King Alexander, while passing through a city, heard that there was a mystical lake in that city and anyone drinking water from that lake becomes eternal. The king rushed to the lake to drink the water, for he wanted to be eternal. As he happily went to drink water, a crow started speaking: “For heaven’s sake do not drink water from the lake. You will become immortal.” Learn to love the impermanent and the permanent. Learn to see elegance in imperfection. There is so much beauty in the impermanent.
Q: Everyone seems to be harming me. Why?
A: No one can hurt you unless you give permission to be hurt. Someone may say a harsh word. That is his freedom. Your freedom is to accept it or reject it. When someone or something is not acceptable, reject it in the same way you reject a salesman trying to sell something that you don’t want. If you don’t reject, it would appear that you have accepted it at some level. This is the disorder. Also, don’t get lost in asking, why? Instead, ask how I can deal with this and deal with it wisely. Being wise involves you to internalise things carefully. You should be alert not to personalise it, if someone says you are a fool. Don’t internalise it. Do not allow past references of someone calling you a fool come unconsciously and support or confuse you. This much of inner alertness, one should have in one’s life. Once you are alert, you will not fall prey to your disempowering self-talk.
Q: What should I watch out for in daily life?
A: When problems come, learn to watch your feelings. If you personalise and feel miserable, then deal with it wisely. Let us say your boss is an arrogant person. Why should you be upset and feel miserable? You are mechanically reacting to it. In fact, it is the problem of the boss and not yours. Be aware how he is not aware and look within yourself if there are areas you are also unconscious of. Then be watchful that you don’t act like him. Treat him with love. Let your love be bigger than his foolishness.
Also, be watchful of your conclusions. You may conclude all bosses are arrogant. You may generalise. Hence you will not be objective in your perceptions. Your conclusions will limit your objectivity. When you are miserable, many other such feelings of the past will show up, and your present feeling will get a boost. Hence, your present feeling is not truly proportionate to the present situation.